wellbeing

Apr

2023

U-Kandu Inspiration: Daddy Cool

One of the things I am really excited about being able to do on this website, is to celebrate inspirational people. People who embody the philosophy of the U-Kandu Way, and deserve to be celebrated for being such fantastic examples of the human spirit and wellness.

Often, inspiration really does begin at home. My Dad, Sukhwant Singh Kandula, is a perfect model of the U-Kandu Way. In fact, he has inspired it.

Dad was born in 1949 (I’m sure he won’t mind my saying!). He ran his first 10k race in June, 2013. He now runs regularly on the Warwickshire and Midlands circuit, completing 10k, and half marathon events. He has been given honorary member status of a running group that operates in Worcestershire, and attends the Leamington Spa Parkrun, both as a runner and as a volunteer, on a weekly basis. He has just run his 164th race. Not bad for a guy who ran his first distance race at the age of 64.

The most inspiring thing about Dad’s approach is not the distance he runs, or the times he achieves (though I will say he’s shaved a good 5 minutes off his earliest race times!), but his mental approach to his running. He isn’t obsessed with his weight, or his race times, or pushing through his limits. He runs because it feels good for him, keeps him healthy, and most of all, because he ENJOYS it.

I firmly believe that if he were running simply for aesthetic gain, or to prove some kind of point, he wouldn’t still be doing it. Those goals are so short term, and fundamentally unsatisfying, that the time inevitably comes when you will look to something else to bolster your sense of self-esteem. Dad is a wonderful example of sustained progress, because his mental approach is one that is geared towards self-fulfillment and the improvement of his health. He walks regularly, runs regularly, eats well, and is fitter than many people half his age. Plus, he makes it look easy!

Whenever we get together for family events, we all share our aspirations. Often, health and fitness will come up (as they do in many families, I’m sure!). While we natter on about what we will do in the year, months or weeks to come, Dad sits quietly, a knowing smile on his face. He doesn’t need to talk about it. He just gets it done. He represents the health and fitness that many aspire to, and is leading by example.

There are no barriers to leading a healthy lifestyle. Only you and the approach that you choose to take. Dad’s approach is one geared towards health, and gentle, sustained improvement. 4 years and innumerable races later, he is proof that his approach works.

Treat yourself as an individual, take your time, and be kind to yourself. With enough patience and self love, you'll find the approach that works for you too.

Apr

2023

New Year, New… Blue?

It’s the dawn of a new year. The internet is flooded with articles about how to make this year your best yet - how to achieve all of those goals that you’ve had in the back of your mind for years, and how to finally break free of negative habits and feel complete in yourself.

Now, I don’t know how you feel at this time of year, but I know that for me, all of this pressure to suddenly self – actualize can paralyse me into doing absolutely nothing. Then, I feel awful about it.

I struggle in January. The days are gloomy, it’s cold, and all I want to do is curl up with a good book and drink hot chocolate. I’m a personal trainer, yes, but I’m also human. Personal trainers go through cycles of motivation too! And I know how challenging these cycles can be to handle.

I used to beat myself up terribly during winter, because I struggled to get myself going with ANYTHING, let alone kickstart an ambitious training regime, or the pursuit of a lifelong dream. As I grow older and hopefully wiser, I’ve realised that just because the world is telling me that it’s the right time to set goals and achieve them, it may not be the case. You are an individual, and what works for you will be unique to you and where you are in your life.

It’s important to accept where you are at all times. Sometimes you are ready to take on the world, to set goals, and to achieve them. Sometimes, you need to rest and take a break. Taking a break doesn't have to mean complete inaction, though. There are actions that you can take if you are finding that your energy is at a low ebb, in preparation for when you are ready to take things further. Here are a few gentle ideas for gradually preparing yourself for more energised times.

Scribble out what you want to achieve

This is a simple way of kicking off a goal setting process, but without putting any pressure on it. You can sit down with a pen and paper, get comfortable, put on some relaxing music, and simply scribble out what it is that you want to do in the future. There’s no right or wrong way of doing this – you just let yourself be truthful, and scribble out absolutely everything that comes to mind. No one will ever see this, it’s a process purely for you, so let yourself be completely honest about what you want. It can be a really cleansing experience, allowing yourself to really consider what you want to be, or do. Enjoy the process and remember, there’s no pressure on it!

Scribble out what you feel frustrated with

This is the opposite to the above in some ways. The method is the same, sit down with a pen and paper, make sure you’re alone and have some headspace, and scribble out whatever comes to mind, but this time focus on what is really frustrating you. This could be things that you feel get in the way of you achieving what you want (this could be lack of time, too many other priorities, a specific person or responsibility), or frustrations that you may have with yourself (do you feel that you just can’t get going, that you have too far to go, that you don’t know what to do?). Just anything at all that makes you feel frustrated, because once it’s on the page, it’s out of you, and you’ll feel better for it.

Stretch, stretch, stretch!

So many people neglect stretching, because it can feel like “light” work that isn’t going to have any major effect. The fact is, stretching is ESSENTIAL if you want to have a well trained, functional body. Flexibility allows you to perform far more effectively when you are ready to do more intensive training, so use the downtime to work on gentle stretching work to get those limbs ready for a more high energy period of training. I personally advocate a mindful approach to training, where you focus in on your body and breath with no distractions, but, if it gets you moving, do some stretching in front of the TV! You will feel brilliant for it, and you won’t get bored!

Learn to Rest

This is a tough one, sometimes. It’s a skill to be able to rest in a way that is recuperative. I still struggle with this, because even when I’m on “holiday”, I’m often still beating myself up about what I should be doing, and making plans for how to do better once my holiday has finished. Perhaps you spend evenings sitting watching Netflix, enjoying chocolate biscuits and feeling guilty – or you spend time feeling anxious about not getting enough done, or an incomplete to-do list that you are pressuring yourself to complete. None of those things are resting. Your mind and body are in a state of turmoil and you will gradually wear yourself down and then feel terrible that you don’t have a great deal of energy to do the things that you want to do so much!

Spend some time learning to really rest. It’s easier said than done, I know, but learn to be kind to yourself, and develop this essential skill. If you’re relaxing with a TV programme, really go with it. If you’re logged off work and your brain needs to decompress, let it happen! If you combine rest with the brainstorming above, you’ll be doing plenty to help yourself to prepare for a more active process of setting and achieving your fitness goals when you’re ready.

Trust yourself

Finally, I can testify, from personal experience, that slow and steady is the way to achieve lifelong, sustainable change. I’ve been letting myself grow and develop new, healthy habits for years, and now, winter isn’t a time for my health and fitness to fall by the wayside. Exercise is a way of life, and I don’t need to kickstart anything in the cold, dark of winter. It’s part of the day to day, business as usual, because I do the hard work of making change and improving at a different time of the year – a time that works well for me and my personal rhythm. You will find your way – trust yourself!

So, there you go! That’s my alternative take on how to take advantage of the dawn of a new year. Take it easy on yourself. January may be peak time for your productivity, or it may not – just listen to your own body and work with it. There’s no forcing long term change, so believe in yourself and the process of preparing the ground for the time that you are ready to take the next steps to achieving all of your health and fitness goals 🙂

May

2019

Why exercise?

Apr

2019

I never feel like I have enough energy to exercise

Ah, we've all been here. You have the best of intentions, but when your alarm goes off in the morning, your bed is heaven. Or you get home from work, exhausted, and a takeaway and Netflix seems far more therapeutic than a workout.

First things first. If you're feeling low on energy and at all out of sorts, go to the doctor and talk about it. There could be medical reasons for how you're feeling, and the first thing to do is to make sure that it isn't the symptom of a medical ailment.

If you've been to the doctor and there isn't anything medical, and you're struggling to get going, it may be time for a change in perspective on exercise.

The trick is to look at exercise in a new way. It isn’t something that you have to do, that’s hard work and exhausting. It’s a pleasure, good for both mind and body, and it gives you energy.

Easier said than done, I know, but this is the ticket to a healthier lifestyle. Somehow, we have become a society that feel that an evening in front of the telly is better for us than a walk outside. That a bar of chocolate can heal our psychological exhaustion from the trials of day to day life. That exercise is a looming cloud over the day, when in reality, it's the sunshine that gives your body nourishment and energy and just so happens to ensure that you stay in shape.

The first step, is to make an appointment with yourself to do your workout. Mark it in your calendar. Treat it like you would any other appointment. It is like a couples therapy session between you and your body! It's IMPORTANT.

Now keep reminding yourself that you have a workout in your diary. Make sure you know what workout you are doing. Keep reminding yourself that you don't miss workouts. Self-perception has the biggest role to play here - if you perceive yourself as someone who sticks to their workout schedule, that is the person you will become.

Now, I'm not saying that feeling low on energy is an easy one to fix. But if you have been to the doctor, and there isn't a medical reason why you're feeling low on energy, it's worth seeing if working on your self-perception helps.

Don't limit yourself. Believe in yourself. It's important that you look after yourself. Exercise will give you energy. It's a way of showing yourself love. It's a way of reminding yourself that you're worth the effort.

Give it a go and see how you get on. Remember, you don't miss workouts! You are active! You work out, and radiate health and energy! You are the picture of wellness. And every so often, you enjoy a takeaway, Netflix series and bar of chocolate and feel absolutely NO guilt whatsoever, knowing that you look after yourself and your body.

That's a good way to live.

Mar

2019

Feeling low. Give myself a break or fight through?

This happens to everyone. We all have days, even weeks, where our energy levels seem low, and mentally, we just aren't on top form.

The first thing to remember: don't beat yourself up about it. It's perfectly natural. Human beings have lots going on! Your physiology is complex, your emotional life is complex, YOU are complex. So don't worry too much if you're going through a patch where you feel, well, human.

Now, every winter, I go through the same cycle. The cold days and long nights draw in, and my motivation plummets. I find it difficult to get myself out of bed, and the idea of hard physical exercise is enough to make me even less likely to face the day. It's taken me a long time, but I've finally learnt. It's okay that I feel this way. The world isn't going to end if I change my routine to fit the way I'm feeling. My body is telling me that it needs a bit of a break, so that’s what I’ll give it.

That doesn't mean that I sit around all day, devouring Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough, without doing any kind of exercise. I know I’ll feel rubbish if I do that. It won’t help. What it does mean, is that I take a gentler approach. I don't force myself to do anything. I take some time to consider what it is that is really putting me off exercising that day (sometimes it's as simple as not wanting to get changed because it's cold!), and modify my approach. I don't want to get changed, so I decide to do a light,15 minute yoga stretch that doesn't require a change of clothes. More often than not, by the time the stretch is over, I'm warm and ready to go. Getting changed doesn't seem like such a barrier.

There's no need to fight yourself at any point of your fitness journey. Your body isn't an enemy. It communicates with you, and if you can listen, you'll find the right balance and learn to develop a seamless rhythm and connection with it. Your default should always be kindness and compassion towards yourself, so if you're having a particularly difficult day, or week, slow down, listen to your body, and don't be afraid to change things up. Your body always wants to move, it thrives on exercise and movement, but that doesn't always mean intense, extreme routines. Sometimes, your body will be content with a relaxing stretch and some quality downtime with you!

Mar

2019

How to overcome procrastination

Ah. Procrastination. A common enemy!

Procrastination is often the result of being unsure. Unsure of what you actually want to be doing. Unsure of what your goal is. Unsure of whether you're doing the right thing.

My first tip for overcoming procrastination is to do a bit of planning. Really consider your goals, and really get them embedded into your thoughts by writing them onto index cards, putting them onto post it notes and sticking them up around the house. Then, consider how you are going to reach those goals. Do some research into how to fulfil your specific goals (or hire a specialist, like a Personal Trainer to write you a programme!). Then, follow the plan. Don't think about it. Just follow the plan. The work that you've done in setting your goals and creating the plan has removed any need for being unsure.

Feb

2019

Why Shouldn’t I Weigh Myself?

Quite simply, it’s not a proper measure of your fitness, wellness, or health. Weight loss is one of the most common aspirations that I come across, but I actively encourage my clients to avoid the scale. Here are three reasons why.

1. Lighter isn’t always healthier

It’s really simple. Dropping pounds on the scale is NOT a sign that you are getting fitter. The measure of your progress is how you feel, the quality of the choices that you’re making, and the power that you are giving yourself to become the person that you want to be by digging deep. It is not whether you sit at a certain level on the BMI scale.

2. There is no such thing as an “ideal” weight.

So many people want to reach a particular weight, or lose a certain amount, because somehow that will mean that they suddenly feel better about themselves. The simple fact is, you can lose lots of weight taking unhealthy measures, such as not eating, or drinking juice all day every day, but you will not feel good in yourself for it. Before you know it, you will put the weight back on, and you will feel terrible for letting yourself gain weight.

There is nothing to gain from obsessing over reaching an “ideal” weight. There is no such thing. Life just isn’t that simple. YOU aren’t that simple!

3. Weight doesn’t account for natural fluctuations

Your body is going through a raft of fluctuations on a regular basis. Women are continually going through hormonal changes that cause water retention, bloating, and general dips in particular neurotransmitters in some cases, and these can all lead to weight fluctuation on the scale. You can immediately set your confidence back by weighing yourself on a day where your hormones are changing, or you are retaining water from a meal. Equally, if you haven’t pooped…. It will make a difference!

There are plenty of ways to measure your progress that don’t involve the scales. Taking measurements is a good way to keep track of real changes in your body shape. As you get fitter and healthier, it’s very likely that you will drop clothes size, and having an item of clothing that you can try on every 6 weeks can also be a good way to enjoy tangible change.

The key thing is how you FEEL. Feeling that you are making the right choices for both your mind and body. Feeling that you are proud of who you are; someone who makes a decision to make positive change, and bravely sees that journey through. Feeling that you are the person that you want to be.

Free yourself from the scale! It isn't the measure of your worth!

To your success 🙂

Jan

2019

Why forget about how my body looks?

Now, I'm not advocating a complete lack of pride in your appearance. I'm suggesting that there is a level of appreciation that your body deserves, that it is probably not receiving. In fact, your body is probably taking continual abuse from the person it is working so hard to keep alive. You.

We have forgotten how wonderful our bodies are. How miraculous. Every second of every day, our bodies work to keep us alive. We breathe, move, live, through our bodies, but we tend to take them for granted. How often do you stand in front of the mirror and shame your body, saying that you wish it was different? That it looks horrible? That you hate it? Now, think about how often you look in the mirror and applaud your body, thank it for keeping you alive, for allowing you to experience life through your senses, for enabling you to do the things you enjoy.

For most of us, there is a major imbalance between the first and second scenario.

It's to be expected, in some ways. Many industries rely on that internal bully that we all have, telling us that we aren't good enough, because that bully is what allows the media to convince you that product a, b or c is going to make you perfect. So you'll buy it, and when you are still looking at yourself, shaming yourself, bullying your body, you'll buy something else to numb the pain for a while.

It's time for a change. It's time to love your body and be grateful for it. To nurture it, and stop bullying it. Experiment with different activities and see what FEELS good, not what someone tells you is a miracle fix for a false aspiration based on how the world tells you you SHOULD look.

Enjoy the life that your body enables you to lead. And forget about what the world is telling you you "should" be. You are you, and you ROCK!

Dec

2018

How do I fit exercise into my busy schedule?

Time. In the modern age, everyone seems to suffer from a lack of Time. And exercise is one of the first casualties of the epidemic.

It can seem very overwhelming, the idea of fitting in exercise when there is so much to do, so many plates to spin, and often, very little time and space to look after yourself. But here's the thing. Looking after your body is literally a matter of life or death. Your body keeps you alive. If you aren't looking after your body, you are reducing its ability to look after you. So, as a society, it might be a good idea for us to bump looking after our bodies up the priority list.

There's a conception that exercise has to be a big deal. That it has to be a regimented thing that you buy special clothes for, go to special places for, or have special equipment for. That's not the case. Exercise is just moving. So you could count walking around the park as exercise. Playing more actively with the kids is exercise. Dancing in your living room is exercise. 10 minutes of moving in a way that gets your heart rate up is exercise. We all have time for that. Try it. Start with 10 minutes a day of something that will get your heart rate up - dance, run around with the kids, take a brisk walk around the block. There's no right or wrong. Just move.

Once that's done, hurrah! You've done a 10 minute workout!

Do that every day, and gradually see if you can build up to 2 active 10 minute sessions a day, then 3. Notice how relaxed you feel after a bit of physical activity. Once you remove the pressure around having to do a long, regimented routine, you'll be able to find ways to incorporate exercise into your life. It will become part of your day, rather than an imposition. Eventually, it will be a habit, you will feel much more connected and confident in your body, and you’ll be getting fitter every day.

Oct

2018

How do I stick to it?

This is a mental game. Sticking to a new habit is purely to do with the mind, and you are in control. That's the thing to remember.

You've got this.

That said, it doesn't always feel that way. So it's always helpful to have someone who you can count on to keep checking in with you and encouraging you to stick to your resolve when the going gets tough. It can be anyone; a friend, member of the family, or a trainer. You've got it covered, you really do, but having someone who cares about your achieving your goals as much as you do, who you can depend on to have your back when any doubt kicks in, is invaluable.

Remember, this is a long term change, so don't pressure yourself into being perfect 100% of the time. If you miss a workout, or have that bag of crisps you promised yourself you wouldn't eat, draw a line under it. Don't let it become a slippery slope to self sabotage. Change is a bumpy road, and life is chaotic, so allow yourself to roll with the punches and don't get stuck in negative, self critical patterns just because you're human.

Think long term. Think sustainable progress. Think accountability. Everyone misses a workout every so often, or has an extra slice of cake they didn't intend to have. The difference between people who are fit and healthy vs those who are not, is how they handle those blips.

Believe in yourself. Cut yourself some slack. Call on your accountability partner when you feel your resolve weakening. And remember, you're improving, every day. Just keep going!

wellbeing

U-Kandu Inspiration: Daddy Cool

U-Kandu Inspiration: Daddy Cool

New Year, New… Blue?

Scribble out what you want to achieve

Scribble out what you feel frustrated with

Stretch, stretch, stretch!

Learn to Rest

Trust yourself

Why exercise?

Why exercise?

"When you are sedentary, you feel lethargic, unmotivated, and mentally drained. This isn't coincidence. This is biology."

I never feel like I have enough energy to exercise

I never feel like I have enough energy to exercise

"The trick is to look at exercise in a new way. It isn’t something that you have to do, that’s hard work and exhausting. It’s a pleasure, good for both mind and body, and it gives you energy."

Feeling low. Give myself a break or fight through?

Feeling low. Give myself a break or fight through?

How to overcome procrastination

How to overcome procrastination

"Procrastination is often the result of being unsure. Unsure of what you actually want to be doing. Unsure of what your goal is."

Why Shouldn’t I Weigh Myself?

Why Shouldn't I Weigh Myself?

1. Lighter isn’t always healthier

2. There is no such thing as an “ideal” weight.

3. Weight doesn’t account for natural fluctuations

Why forget about how my body looks?

Why forget about how my body looks?

Many industries rely on that internal bully that we all have, telling us that we aren't good enough, because that bully is what allows the media to convince you that product a, b or c is going to make you perfect.

How do I fit exercise into my busy schedule?

How do I fit exercise into my busy schedule?

How do I stick to it?

How do I stick to it?

"..it's always helpful to have someone who you can count on to keep checking in with you and encouraging you to stick to your resolve when the going gets tough. It can be anyone; a friend, member of the family, or a trainer."

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